Inspiration: Not the Usual This Week

I was going to post my normal pictures and music that inspired me this week but when thinking of inspiration two things stuck in my head and two things only. First was the song from the group piece that I am in. It is "Drumming Song" by Florence + The Machine, and I love it. It is at the top. But what I really wanted to write about was letting go. That was really what my week was about.

I'm a very bold person, and I never let anything try to stop me. In some ways, I think it's my best trait but sometimes it can be my worse. You see, I never can just let go. I'll believe in someone with all of my heart. I'll get attached, but life doesn't always go as planned and when there's problems I never can just let go. I'll keep pushing, keep hoping, keep praying, but sometimes all the action in the world wont help anything.

In January, I gave up. Second semester had just started and my life got turned completely upside down. There were tears, a lot of them, and I just couldn't handle it anymore. I had to get away, so I stopped trying. At everything. School. Writing. Cello. Friends. Relationships. Everything but Dance. I thought that by letting go everything might just fall into place. It didn't.

I now have bad grades, a novel that still isn't finished, very rusty skills at cello, less friends than I've ever had in my entire life, and I'm single. Am I angry at myself? Well, it's complicated.

I learned that when it comes to school, no matter how smart you are, you still have to work. I had always taken my work ethic for granted but now I value it. I also learned that cello isn't like riding a bike, you can't just relearn all your skills in a couple of minutes.

But on the other hand, I found that real friends are the ones that stay with you even when you have given up. Sometimes, after putting so much work into a relationship you have to step back and see if it can stand on its own. And taking a break from writing can occasionally be a good thing. It gives you a chance for a new perspective.

So letting go, not always the best. But do I regret it? Never.

Inspirations of the week! (Feb6-12)

#1 Blackbird by the Beatles

Must I even have a reason?

#2 Life Experience
Thought I would just add this since it really did inspire me a bit.
Sometimes you believe you know people. You hear all about them and think you have them all figured out. That you know "their type." It's human nature to come to quick conclusions. It's a way of protecting ourselves. But once in awhile you have to communicate. Take in your surroundings, feel whats going on around you. Really try to get to understand yourself and people around you. It makes everything so much more clear. Sometimes you find the answers without asking the question. Sometimes you just have to listen. :)

#3 Star Wars quote

Like many other nerd brethren, I forced myself to see Star Wars: Episode one yesterday. And although I do have many problems with the newer Star Wars movie, I must admit that I have a good quote from Yoda that I just could not get out of my head.
"Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. Yes, I sense much fear in you."